Conversations about money are often shrouded in secrecy.
Add debt into the mix and it’s a potent combination. And it gets worse the older we get.
Why?
Because we assume we should have it all together already.
That we shouldn’t struggle.
Shouldn’t need help.
And that admitting that we do is a major weakness.
This week is Debt Awareness Week in the UK and while we don’t need someone to designate a specific timeframe for us to reflect on how we can tackle our financial areas of concern, it’s a great opportunity to learn from others about how they’re dealing with their debt. And to challenge some of our preconceptions about what someone in debt ‘looks like’.
Take the case of one of my Rainmakers. As with all Rainmakers she was smart, ambitious and lit up a room. She earned 6 figures with a hefty bonus on top. But she was also crippled by spiralling credit card debt. And the more she earned the worse it became as her lifestyle expanded into the space she told herself her increased earnings had generated.
Or another who had signed a lease on a new flat with her partner based on their joint incomes, only to discover a month later that he was cheating on her. She swiftly ended the relationship but was left stuck with rental payments she couldn’t afford on an 18 month lease with no break clause for a year.
In both cases, from the outside looking in, you’d assume that they had unblemished financial records, and were the epitome of adulting excellence. (Assuming such a thing exists!).
Yet in reality, these Rainmakers had the same financial worries that most of us confront at one point in our lives.
Worries that, by keeping them to ourselves, compound over time, much like investment returns just in reverse, and become monsters that haunt us in our sleep.
That’s why talking about money, including our debt, is so important.
If you’re struggling to identify someone you think might be a psychologically safe space for you to share your worries and formulate a practical plan, there are some great free advice services that could help:
️ @citizensadvicecharity
️ Mental Health and Money Advice
️ National Debtline
️ @stepchangecharity
But given every action we take first starts in the mind, here are 5 affirmations to remind you to stay on track:
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I am more than the money mistakes of my past.
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My debt does not define me.
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I know my numbers and am not afraid to face them to make decisions about my financial future.
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I am wealthy in more ways than one.
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I will not financially self-sabotage by living beyond my means to impress my peers or strangers on social media.
Take what you need.
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